Morning...

How my mornings have changed,
How my thoughts have changed ways,

A new day has come
A new venture to conquer
but how can I face the world when my mornings have shut their glory at me?

How my mornings have changed,
How this death has changed its ways

A new day has come
And again I feel numb

The first thought
The first realization
The first idea that crosses my mind
before I even have a chance to open my tightly shut eyes...
is of loss

And then you wonder why I'm moody
And why I tumble and fall
You try to wake each morning with the understanding of it all...

Who?

Who will tell me he's proud of me for the way I raise my son?
Who will sense that all is not right in my challenging,at times, life?
Who will tell me not to worry and that all is under control?
Who will hug me and whisper in my ear that I am worthy and strong?
Who will take joy in the cakes that I bake?
Who will call me on Fridays just the way you had?
Who will call me sweetie and make me feel forever young?
Who will laugh and wink at me at the jokes that are now left behind?
Who will make all the efforts to make sure I live well?
Who will teach me through his actions how to be humane?
Who will I call Daddy and who will hold my hand?
Who?
Who?
Who?
A thousand times adieu...

She sinks...

She sinks and she drowns
She lets the pain consume her
She drowns in her sorrow
And releases the bitter tears

She sinks and she falls
How the hell is she supposed to manage it all?
She is together
She is alone
She is slowly seperating from the other half of her soul

She was strong
She was power
She was soft
She was the mother

She is weak
She is broken
She is shattered
I feel her hollow...

She is mother
She always will be
But now the roles have turned
There is a new duty

She sinks in her sorrow
Gives in to the sadness
Gives in to the shock
and drowns...

She is mother
I am daughter
She is power
I must grow stronger
She is mother
I am weak
She is mother
I must seek...
The roles have turned
The tide has come
Wipe your tears away
My time has come...

Sometimes

Sometimes I forget
and I laugh
amd I chit chat with my friends

Sometimes I forget
and I wait for my dad to call
and see his face

Sometimes I forget
for minutes and minutes
and then I feel so bad

How can you just be?
I ask myself at times
How can you continue?
When you tend to be so blind

Sometimes I forget
and then I call my mom
Always when I hear her
I breakdown and cry

Sometimes I forget
But Most of the time I don't
Sometimes my mind just simply will not
let me take it all in and cope

Sometimes I wipe my tears and look at them...
so clear
so small
so don't belong to me at all

Sometimes I want to say Daddy once more
without it being part of a conversation I shouldn't have to endure
Sometimes I want to say Daddy once again
And you will answer and take this horrid pain away.

Rescue me...

I'm running,
I'm crying,
but no one can tell;

I'm hittng and screaming
at the pain that I feel.

My dry eyes, my posture
hide it all well,
but watch me,
I'm falling
Wake me up from this spell.

My role

This thread that I hang on is slipping away,
This face that I live by will one day fade,
Your smell and your being is all that I crave,
But, G-d knows, that now is my time to be brave...